Author Archives: crampsforlife
a week before the 5th grade talent show… cut to me crying in my room as i realized i could not do an amazing duo performance the way i envisioned it in my head because the girls i “auditioned” were … Continue reading
i literally sat in front of my computer for a full 3 minutes with my mouth open, in silence, after watching this for the first time.
reason #48 why you shouldn’t wear a BIKINI if you are the drunk big girl at the beach. You should probably also stay away from the water if you’ve been drinking 22oz Coronas since 6am. This shit is hilarious…. it … Continue reading
these kids are too much. that horrible sound you hear off in the distance? oh. just ignore it. it’s just our ovaries screaming over here. we are now accepting applications for dudes that are ready to pump out a cute, … Continue reading
can not get enough of this. the whole album is amazing.
9:01pm- watch video friend sent. laugh hysterically at the creepy hilariousness. 9:12pm- still giggling at the rasta rooster. feel slightly haunted by video. 9:13pm- guilt sets in about giggle fit. 9:14pm- sit child down for a talk about the danger … Continue reading
Told you we aint dead yet we been livin’ through your internet you don’t have to believe everything you think we’ve been programmed wake up, we miss you.
I caught a glimpse, but its been forgotten So here we are again I made a vow, to carry you home… home I really tried to do what you wanted It all went wrong again I made a vow, to … Continue reading
every time i hear this song, my inner 65 year old black southern woman at a baptist church comes out and i sit there the whole time shouting out shit like “AMEN GURL” …. “MMMMMHHMMMM… TELL him!” and “CHHUCHH” badu … Continue reading
huh? no dude. i do NOT wrap my sheet around me every time it comes out of the dryer and walk around the house blasting this song while pretending to be christie turlington. pffft. come ON! who the hell would … Continue reading
sometimes i wake up wondering what madonna’s doing right now. and then i remember that not only did she make millions while she SLEPT, she’s laying on a mattress made of $100 bills snuggled up naked next to some male … Continue reading
and by “territory” i mean hair. creeps, love em.
we are so up-to-here with this charlie sheen shit we are about to go postal on an old folks home as they all hold little baby kittens and sing love songs to us. yep. one more person says “winning” to … Continue reading
franco. some dude. his friend could get it too. obama. classic newman. sean lyles, we’re your biggest fans. depp. gosling. jay electronica.
yesterday was the Biebs birthday. happy birthday you little badass. some advice for the next year of your life: hang with tyler. skate til you break something. don’t let anyone fuck with you. get in one good fight for all … Continue reading
my girl sent me this today with the subject “pharrell. shower scene.” let me just say, I think this is one of THE sexiest songs ever made… but a shower scene? Yeah. Pharrell can get away with it. there is … Continue reading
“i have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love.” -mother teresa
USE A FUCKING COASTER NEXT TIME BITCH.
sooner or later, it all comes crashing down… ain’t that the truth. one day you wake up and realize the rug gets pulled out from under you because it is MEANT to be, you are not MEANT to be where … Continue reading
she was so dope. this song has gone triple diamond in my house since she came out with it. still amazing. come back lauryn.
no. kool aid is NOT a metaphor for something else. settle down. he’s only 19. damn. but if he said the aliens were coming to get us and we needed to throw on some black nikes, we’d do it.
“you do not have the right to quit trying. (the universe wobbles when you do.) you have the right to quit toxic people. (they’re contagious.)”
wow. just…. wow. she’s got it all figured out.
and it usually is EXACTLY this in my mind. the new radiohead is the audible equivalent of your mom tucking you in to bed with some hot cocoa after you got beat up on the playground. aka- it’s amazing.
we watch shit like this and read cookbooks…
every time i have to spend time in silverlake (LA) or williamsburg (BK) i get this song stuck in my head for weeks.
let’s all say a little prayer for this girl’s future college roommate on the the night this chick discovers FourLoko, weed cookies and shrooms.